 | I used to homeschool my kids. Now you’re homeschooling yours, whether you want to or not. Maybe this can help. I was never one of those crafting-DIY-resourceful homeschool moms. I was more of a reading-on-the-couch-don’t-bother-me homeschool mom. My kids are fine. Yours will be, too. |
When my kids were little, a schedule kept me sane. Our day went roughly like this:
I made a big breakfast--pancakes, fruit, eggs, sausage, muffins, etc. Why? Because it got our day started with structure. It got everybody settled at the table, organized, busy. I read to them while they ate. It was nice. Have the kids clear the table, load the dishwasher, or sweep up crumbs. If they’re big enough to play sports, they’re big enough to do housework.
After breakfast, do some kind of school work. Since you might not be used to homeschooling, use whatever you’ve got--worksheets, computer drills, books, journaling, crafts, art, piano practice. Use that little bit of industriousness that they have in the morning to get educational. Even if it’s just an hour, even if it’s lightweight and not up to the level of work they’d be doing in school, keep learning as part of their day. The whole world is going to get behind on education, so it’s okay if your kids do, too.
Assign chores. Age is no excuse not to do chores. Babies can watch you fold laundry while you sing-song where’s that other red sock oh here it is. They’re learning, trust me. Toddlers can match socks, fold their tiny t-shirts, stack underwear. Elementary schoolers can do the whole laundry process with supervision, and middle schoolers can run the whole show. Boom. No more laundry for Mom. You’re welcome.
Lunch is not your responsibility. Let the kids scrounge for lunch. If your kitchen is full of easy-access food, they can make their own lunches. Fruit, lunchmeat, leftovers, cheese, cereal, Goldfish, they get to pick. Don’t worry about nutrition--they had a decent breakfast and you can push vegetables at dinner. Tell them the cleanup is part of the deal. You can take your book or your phone or your knitting and sit within earshot to make sure nothing explodes. Enjoy the distance.
After lunch, nappers nap and everybody else gets to run wild. If you’ve got a yard, this is easy. If you don’t have a yard, let them play video games, read, craft, build a fort, do a puzzle, Legos, anything they want. As long as they’re not watching porn, it’s okay. (By the way, as distressing as it is the first time you catch them, don’t fret--it’s an educational opportunity. If they’re old enough to find porn, they’re old enough for an honest talk about sex. It’s 2020. Act like it.) Don’t worry if this running wild is not educational or enriching. Your job is to make sure they live through coronavirus and don’t spread it to the vulnerable. That is all.
This is also a great time to bake something. Group baking is a glorious mess, and you’ll have dessert after dinner. Double win.
In the late afternoon, pull one kid out to be your dinner helper for the day. If the others are too little to be left alone, put on a movie. While you cook and your dinner helper sets the table or washes strawberries or stirs the soup, talk to that helper about the food, feelings, friends, apocalyptic worries, etc. Everybody needs some alone time with their mom. Also, someday soon, this kid will be making dinner while you sip chardonnay on the couch.
Dinner. Make it an occasion. Talk about your day as if you weren’t within ten feet of them all day. Eat that dessert.
Bath time is immediately after dinner, before they’re tired and whiny.
Wind down with a movie or reading aloud to them.
Put them kids in bed earlier than usual. Older kids can read in bed until they’re sleepy. You need time to drink a glass of wine and stare into the mid-distance.
The beautiful thing about a schedule is that you can deviate from the schedule and everybody’s thrilled with it. This is more challenging in confinement because the world is no longer your oyster, but it can still happen.
You’ve been the parent your kids need all this time, and you still are. So throw out that old parenting playbook, and go your own way.
I made a big breakfast--pancakes, fruit, eggs, sausage, muffins, etc. Why? Because it got our day started with structure. It got everybody settled at the table, organized, busy. I read to them while they ate. It was nice. Have the kids clear the table, load the dishwasher, or sweep up crumbs. If they’re big enough to play sports, they’re big enough to do housework.
After breakfast, do some kind of school work. Since you might not be used to homeschooling, use whatever you’ve got--worksheets, computer drills, books, journaling, crafts, art, piano practice. Use that little bit of industriousness that they have in the morning to get educational. Even if it’s just an hour, even if it’s lightweight and not up to the level of work they’d be doing in school, keep learning as part of their day. The whole world is going to get behind on education, so it’s okay if your kids do, too.
Assign chores. Age is no excuse not to do chores. Babies can watch you fold laundry while you sing-song where’s that other red sock oh here it is. They’re learning, trust me. Toddlers can match socks, fold their tiny t-shirts, stack underwear. Elementary schoolers can do the whole laundry process with supervision, and middle schoolers can run the whole show. Boom. No more laundry for Mom. You’re welcome.
Lunch is not your responsibility. Let the kids scrounge for lunch. If your kitchen is full of easy-access food, they can make their own lunches. Fruit, lunchmeat, leftovers, cheese, cereal, Goldfish, they get to pick. Don’t worry about nutrition--they had a decent breakfast and you can push vegetables at dinner. Tell them the cleanup is part of the deal. You can take your book or your phone or your knitting and sit within earshot to make sure nothing explodes. Enjoy the distance.
After lunch, nappers nap and everybody else gets to run wild. If you’ve got a yard, this is easy. If you don’t have a yard, let them play video games, read, craft, build a fort, do a puzzle, Legos, anything they want. As long as they’re not watching porn, it’s okay. (By the way, as distressing as it is the first time you catch them, don’t fret--it’s an educational opportunity. If they’re old enough to find porn, they’re old enough for an honest talk about sex. It’s 2020. Act like it.) Don’t worry if this running wild is not educational or enriching. Your job is to make sure they live through coronavirus and don’t spread it to the vulnerable. That is all.
This is also a great time to bake something. Group baking is a glorious mess, and you’ll have dessert after dinner. Double win.
In the late afternoon, pull one kid out to be your dinner helper for the day. If the others are too little to be left alone, put on a movie. While you cook and your dinner helper sets the table or washes strawberries or stirs the soup, talk to that helper about the food, feelings, friends, apocalyptic worries, etc. Everybody needs some alone time with their mom. Also, someday soon, this kid will be making dinner while you sip chardonnay on the couch.
Dinner. Make it an occasion. Talk about your day as if you weren’t within ten feet of them all day. Eat that dessert.
Bath time is immediately after dinner, before they’re tired and whiny.
Wind down with a movie or reading aloud to them.
Put them kids in bed earlier than usual. Older kids can read in bed until they’re sleepy. You need time to drink a glass of wine and stare into the mid-distance.
The beautiful thing about a schedule is that you can deviate from the schedule and everybody’s thrilled with it. This is more challenging in confinement because the world is no longer your oyster, but it can still happen.
- Switch up school work and running-wild times.
- Have a breakfast picnic on the living room floor.
- Order pizza and watch a movie instead of making dinner.
- Have pajama day and binge-watch Netflix.
- Skype somebody far away.
- Bring out your stash of unused makeup, nail polish, and beauty samples and let them decorate themselves and each other.
- Put the kids in charge of a meal. Just eat whatever they produce.
You’ve been the parent your kids need all this time, and you still are. So throw out that old parenting playbook, and go your own way.
 | Here is proof that I homeschooled--my boys in pajamas holding a sign they made themselves. |
